Sleepwalking through Life…

As I stood below the office having a cup of coffee, taking a break from playing emails, noticed the frenetic traffic around. (even at 2 pm in the afternoon)

Everybody seems to be in a mindless state of motion. We want to reach from A to B, whether it be physically, financially or emotionally. Short-term or mid-term goals is what drives us. But, once we reach the goal – the next promotion/ marriage/ buying the first home, the euphoria dies down almost instanteously. The achievement is replaced by the next ‘bigger’ and ‘better’ goal. Progress or materialistic evolution as Darwin would’ve termed it.

Hmm, kinda explains how life is just a journey without a fixed destination – quite a rocky one must say…Awaiting for a cold, fresh brook to wash my face in.

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Although paradoxically different, both western and eastern life philosophies can be seen as Newton’s law of inertia…
Western: MOVE – KEEP MOVING, Set life goals and strive to achieve them
Eastern: STAY STILL – JUST BE, every desire is just a manifesto of evil

The boss shouts out for a work checklist, and back to ground realities.
Excel, word, powerpoint = Tandoori chicken, petrol and the next vacation to the Arctic

Letter to the ex-wife…

Dear Soumya,

Finally I get to spread my arms and have the entire bed to myself. I was looking forward to this freedom for the past few years, and finally time and space are mine alone. 

But hold on, why am I not all kicked about life again, the way it was always supposed to be? I had to roam the world, read 100s of books, sleep with 20 different women and exercise daily to build those ever-elusive 6-packs. It’s been a year now and I can’t even tick mark one of them! Why don’t they excite me anymore?

The eyes do shut down every night but the mind remains alert, hoping to hear the light snore which used to lullaby me to sleep. My hands tentatively move around trying to touch the soft fingertips which had warmth and at times heat too, as my once-reddened cheeks would endorse. Do you still grow your fingernails and paint them with that weird shade of silver?

Yes, I know I was the one who blamed you for being the reason for us drifting apart. Your anger, your tears and your constant cribbing were taking a toll on my peace of mind. But then somewhere I forgot that those were born out of my indifference, my cold behavior and my falling out of love with you. You finally asked me did I ever love you? I did not reply, which said a lot and you left…

Today, I ask myself what is love? If it’s not yearning for you to grab away the Belgian chocolate scoop from my hand, or change the channel the very moment when Sachin is about to hit yet another century, or chuckle at my inane jokes when everyone else in the world seems to be rather laughing at me.

Ma and Pa miss you but they won’t tell me. They want us to be happy – whether together or apart. We laugh often now, but it’s worse than the canned laughter in the late-night sitcoms, we all used to ridicule. Life is good otherwise, my cholesterol is under control and I don’t fart that frequently anymore.

I saw you at the grocery last month – you still buy watermelons? But you never shared my liking for them. I wanted to walk over to you and tell you to burn that fugly frilly yellow frock, but strength eluded me as always. Next week, I’m moving out of this goddam city which throws up your shadows around every nook and corner. But then I know a part of you will never leave me…You’ve taken away my soul and left yours behind in my heart. The heart which I once claimed beats only for you and never thought that it always will.

Love you hamesha,

Adi

 

Sorrow

‘Between the devil and the deep-blue sea’ as a proverb was coined by a man removing his tie on the way home in his weather-beaten Corolla at 8:30 pm on a rainy Monday evening, stuck in a heavy jam on the crowded streets of Cairo.

As per a world-wide survey which I never did, the top 2 reasons why majority of homo-sapiens were trudging along unhappily on earth are penned in blood below:

The Wife

Despite the fact that every Tom, Dick and the hairy Harry gives you advice on not to commit suicide, you take all of it as a joke and infact even laugh along. There is so much excitement to take the plunge that Indians even dance merrily in their own marriage procession. Americans are probably a step ahead and they repeat the same error continuously in a loop – thankfully only one at a time, unlike the Arabs who manage a 4 entrance villa for their 4 wives & conjoined families.

Ask any married man & atleast once in his lifetime they would have had a fantasy to either regain bachelorhood or atleast have the option of an exchange offer!

The Boss

But hold on, the lady has tough competition from the vulture of the corporate jungle who scavenges on you day in & out, but doesn’t allow you to die. The bosses’ job is to ensure that you do his job and congratulate him for the fantastic job he managed to get done from you. So suck it up boys!

But luck is on your side here, because unlike a wife you can change your bosses more often. The only little asterisk disclaimer is the fact that you do NOT get to choose your boss!

Thankfully, this sorrow lasts for only 2/3rds of your adult life, since there are 8 hours of death every night, which is the only peaceful and blissful reason to live…

Btw, let me know if you find a 3rd reason to be sad, and I’ll buy you a brand new iPad!